What to do for solving this problem in Church?

Full Question:

Have you ever had a pastor try to tell you how to live your life? I've been saved for 4 years now. I am a Christian, and I love Jesus. 4 years ago, my husband died in Iraq, while fighting for our country. Unfortunately for me I didn't have any children with him.

I live a very healthy lifestyle I don't: drink any alcohol, smoke or use tobacco products, use illegal street drugs (just the occasional Tylenol), and I'm completely celibate. I don't date and I'm not courting anyone at the moment.

For the last 3 1/2 years, I have been going to school, and working 4 jobs. It doesn't leave me a lot of spare time, but I do make time for church every Sunday morning. But I go to work every Sunday afternoon. Last Sunday, one of the associate pastors asked me to stay to talk to him, but I told him that I couldn't because I had to go to work. This is when he said, " I've had my eyes on you for quite some time now. It's come to my attention that you are working on the Lord's day? You should be ashamed of putting your job before the Lord. Money will lead you straight to hell sister." He shouted the last part in front of the whole blooming church.

This is when I turned around in front of the whole church and said, " I am sick and tired of you and your awful "hell fire and brimstone" speeches! I have to work. If I don't then I get behind on my rent and bills. Are you going to give me the money to support myself? I have 4 jobs so that I won't have to take out student loans to pay for college and my living expenses. God wants me to love only Him and I do! I tithe the way the bible tells me to. I attend church every Sunday morning, even when I'm tired, and I want to sleep. I come here because I love the pastor, and the people. But you sir are a judgmental horses behind! Oh just one more thing before I go. That "anonymous" donation that the church received today, came from MY pocket! And the "anonymous" donation of the materials for the children ministry, came from MY pocket! So when you say that money is going to lead me straight to hell! Why don't you stop and control your tongue as it says in the bible!"

I walked back into the church, and told the pastor that I wanted the check for the donation for the building fund back. I was not going to stay in a church that employed hypocrites! I haven't gone back to that church in 4 weeks. I was an active member there for 3 years, and that was not the first time the associate pastor tried to lecture me about working on Sundays. I've found another church that's bigger and better. I refuse to be put down, because I have to work on Sundays, and make money to support myself. The Lord understands that times are tough, and jobs are hard to come by.

Have you ever had a pastor tell you how to live your life? Please help me with what to do in this situation.

Answer:

Your question was a bit big one and fist I thought may be is it some troll. But anyway God made me read it and I find that this is a good question. Thank you for asking this question for I can see that the situation is really bad. I know that you really need some good advices at these time and I do believe I can give some valuable advices and an exact answer to you for your question.

First of all, I am totally sorry for all the situations and problems which you are passing through life and for what you face in your church. I am also happy to see that you have find the living God Jesus Christ in the midst of all those problems. Also happy to inform you that we all have a good and wonderful pastor 'Jesus Christ' along with a wonderful counselor Holy Spirit.

Anyway I am getting directly into the answer. The first thing and the most important thing which I noticed is that the associate pastor is the only one who is wrong here causing troubles. There will be always persons like this in every church and is even mentioned in the bible. This pastor was also like the pastor mentioned in the 3 John1:9,10 which says "I wrote to the church, but Diotrephes, who loves to have the preeminence among them, does not receive us. Therefore, if I come, I will call to mind his deeds which he does, prating against us with malicious words. And not content with that, he himself does not receive the brethren, and forbids those who wish to, putting them out of the church."

You don't provided any more details with the church and what I think from the best information you provide was that your church do not have many problems. The only problem I noticed by discerning was the selection of immature associate pastor. He also lack essential bible knowledge bible also according to me. Bible says it very clear that Son of God is the lord of Sabbath and Jesus Christ working on the Sabbath. Jesus healed many people on the Sabbath day giving glory to the father and told very clearly that, our heavenly father is always working. Pharisees and Sadducee are the people who offended Jesus Christ for working in Sabbath and Jesus even pointed their mistake out by telling them how David and the people with him eat on the Sabbath day the only food separated for priests. So the teaching of going to hell, if you work on sabbath is entirely wrong.

Bible also says clearly that if you want to give someone an advice or something, your should have to first love and pray for them and talk to them in the right opportunity with the pure mentality to bring him close to God. He should also have to advice the other very personally and silently with basis in bible. He also did that in a wrong way.

I should also have to mention that what you done is also not a hundred percentage right thing according to the bible. The first thing was that, you can tell him that you are not free today and to ask him that is it possible with some another day which you am free. The next was it was not right to behave to some associate pastor like this because bible says if there is an issue against a pastor or so, you should have to deal it only with the support of some associate active members. As there was a main pastor in your church, you can also report this to him silently the matter according to Bible. But I am also able to understand your situations also.

By these, the main fact is that which you should have to understand is that 'No church and no person is perfect' and we can see problems like this on the first century church too. For this very reason, I don't prefer you to change your church. If you change this church, surely you can get out of this problem. But the fact is when you go to another church, there will be also some another problems like this for sure which may be even worse than these. There will be problems like this in all churches and you can never find a good or a perfect church. The total gain will be just a waste of time by skipping many churches.

In every church there may be some mistakes in their teaching of bible. There is no meaning in changing your church for this reason also for it is common. Otherwise your church should be a church which always teach wrong things or teach the primary concepts in wrong way. If I tell my case, I have very good knowledge in Bible by the grace of God. So whenever I listen to somebody's speech or the speech in my church, there will be always some mistakes in their speech, according to me. Very rarely I heard speeches with no mistakes.

If I skip my church for this reason that there messages are wrong, I was sure that I can never find a church for me in this whole earth. What I am doing was to be silent by realizing the fact that 'no one and no church is perfect and mistake can happen to any person for he is human.' I don't think for myself that I will not made any mistakes. Mistakes can also happen to me or to anyone.

What I have to say as a solution for this situation was to go and see the main pastor in your church and talk about this whole situation with him and find a solution as this is a way written in the bible. Also keep praying to God to help you solve this problem and to deliver you from this situation.

And if you can't stay in this church in such a way and if you want to leave your church so badly. I will say you to please contact your main pastor itself and gain permission to shift this church and when you reach the church you mentioned or soem other church, first talk to the main pastor about 'why you skipped the last church and ask him permission to be a member of this church?' You should only be a member of this new church after obtaining this permission. If you do these things like this, it is biblical and otherwise it is not biblical and you should have to give account for that in front of God.

I provided you the right answer with the best of my knowledge and wisdom. Now it is your duty to act. May God bless you with this answer to take right choice and decisions. God bless.